Embarrassing story #9

It's that time of the month again, isn't it? Time for me to share another embarrassing story about myself?

....well, if I must.

This story is actually one that is often told about me, but which I don't actually remember happening. I was too young to remember it, you see. The earliest memory I have is from when I was a little younger than three, and I think this happened right around that time. (No, it didn't happen just last year or anything. Though, that would make it even funnier.)

So, it was Christmas Eve, and I was at my grandparents house. It was evening-ish, and we had all finished dinner a while ago and were just sitting around the table talking. Well, the adults were talking. I don't know what I was doing (I don't have any recollection of this incident, remember?). Anyway, the conversation turned around to Santa Claus, which caught my attention. I mean, it was Christmas Eve! My cousins and I were always pretty excited around Christmas, looking through the J.C. Penny catalog and marking all the toys we wanted. And, it was evening already! We would go to bed soon and then Santa would come, and before we knew it it would be morning and we'd have presents!

So the conversation came around to Santa Claus and then my grandmother, thinking herself quite funny and clever, sneakily put her hand down underneath the tablecloth and knocked on the underside of the wooden table.

"What's that?!", she asked, "Probably Santa Claus on the roof right now with his reindeer!"

I burst into tears. I just kept crying and crying and crying. Not only was I worried about not being in bed and having him come and not give us presents, but I was pretty scared of Santa himself. For a long time I refused to have my picture taken with Santa. (Can you blame me? Haven't you ever seen that scene in A Christmas Story where he goes to see Santa? He's scary!) And now he was on the roof!

Needless to say, it took a while for me to calm down, and I was wary of my grandmother for a while after that.

Lessons learned: Santa can be scary, don't try and trick kids around Christmastime, and never mess around with rules about receiving presents. If you do, kids will burst into tears.




Check back next month for another embarrassing story - "The Slow Torture Of Ice Cream And Its Melting Point"